


If Not For You

by Squatta



Category: Free!
Genre: M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-20
Updated: 2014-02-20
Packaged: 2018-01-13 03:36:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1211152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Squatta/pseuds/Squatta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Life after the tournament has brought the friends together again and closer than ever, but Makoto can't help but truly contemplate his relationship with Haru, and if having Rin back in their lives will change things. MakoHaru.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If Not For You

**Author's Note:**

> Just a really simple MakoHaru story. I just wanted to write this to take a stab at this series.  
> Originally posted on my FF.net account on 1/28/14.

Makoto sat by the side of the Iwatobi High Pool, finally realizing that evening was approaching by the orange tint in the sky. The surface of the water in front of him suddenly broke as the man that emerged shook the wet hair from his face as he always did.

Makoto couldn't help but smile a bit as he leaned back on his hands, "Hey, Haru, it's almost evening already so we should get going soon."

"Fine, one more lap," Haru said in his usual monotone voice and dove back in without waiting for a response.

Makoto let out a soft chuckle and stood up, watching Haru swim gracefully from one end of the pool to the other. It was never boring to watch how wonderfully he swam, and it was nearly impossible for Makoto to take his eyes off of him when he did.

Shortly, Haru resurfaced at the end of the pool a second time, taking in a breath then a sigh of contentment. If there was anything Haru truly lived for, it was for swimming.

Makoto leaned over and extended his hand to his friend in the water. "Here," he said with his signature, friendly smile.

Haru always seemed to make a face as if to say 'I'm perfectly capable of getting myself out of the pool' but he always took the hand Makoto offered to him nonetheless. It was a pleasant feeling for both of them as it somehow always seemed to reassure the two of their bond that they shared. Since they had been friends since a young age their relationship had never wavered, but it was always nice to have moments like this – that even without words there was conformation that they were still so closely bonded.

Makoto handed him a towel and the two made their way towards the club room to get changed. It seemed that Nagisa, Rei, and Gou had gone home a long time ago so it was just the two of them in the room.

Haru grabbed his phone from his locker after drying his hair. "Ah, a message…"

"From who?" Makoto glanced over after sliding his pants on and craned his neck to look at the phone screen.

"Rin, he's wondering if I can meet up tomorrow," it almost looked to Makoto as if there was a glint in his eye.

"Oh… Is that so?" Makoto grinned and continued sliding on his button-up shirt.

Haru didn't respond but instead started pushing buttons on his phone.

"Isn't it great that Rin has gone back to being his old self?" Makoto continued, latching one button on his shirt after another. "It's great that we're all friends again and he wants to hang out with us like we used to."

"Mm," Haru simply nodded and pressed the send button on his phone.

Makoto clenched at his shirt over his chest for a moment before picking up his uniform jacket and sliding it on. Haru still seemed to be in his jammers.

But it was okay, Makoto was patient and he didn't really mind if sometimes Haru was a little resistant to changing back into his school uniform. If it was Haru, he'd wait as long as it took.

Their walk home was pleasant and quiet as the evening breeze started to pick up. Makoto looked out over the ocean; he still felt a sense of fear when he saw it, but he couldn't deny that it also looked very beautiful when it was calm and the sun was hitting it just right. He knew that Haru would probably jump right in if he got the chance every time they walked past it together, but Makoto knew that Haru held back for him. Honestly, Makoto wouldn't mind if Haru decided to swim in the ocean every day, but it made him a little happy that Haru considered how he felt.

He suddenly felt the urge that he actually wanted to get closer to the ocean, and Makoto started walking towards it.

"Makoto?" He heard Haru say in a slightly worried voice from behind him.

Makoto sat down on the low wall separating the beach from the sidewalk and looked back. "I just felt like sitting for a bit, I guess? Sorry, you can go on without me if you'd like."

Haru stood in place for a second or two before making his way next to Makoto and sitting beside him. The two looked out onto the ocean together in silence until Haru spoke up.

"Is it still scary?" He asked simply.

"Hmm…" Makoto paused and inhaled deeply, "No, although I'm not sure if I could jump in right here and now. I'm fine with just looking at it like this, though. I see it every day whether I want to or not; I'm surrounded by it if you really think about it."

Haru turned his head to look at Makoto. Makoto kept his gaze focused towards the sun setting over the ocean.

"I think you'd come save me again if I ever went back into the ocean and something happened to me. Ah… But that's kind of silly to say, I guess," Makoto chuckled, "It's not like you'll always be there…"

"I will save you," Haru said in a firm voice and Makoto turned his head, his eyes a bit wide. "And I know you'd do the same for me; you have done the same for me."

"Thanks, Haru," Makoto smiled warmly and Haru simply nodded. It was extremely rare for Haru to smile himself, but Makoto knew his feelings very well without him having to portray them through facial expressions.

"You can't go into the ocean again without me, alright?" Haru added.

"I won't," Makoto replied.

* * *

"I'm home," Makoto called out, closing the door behind him.

"Welcome home, dear," his mother called out to him, "Dinner is almost ready."

"Ah, I'm fine, I ate earlier so I'm not hungry," he responded, making his way towards his room.

"Oh. Well, if you change your mind feel free to come down," she replied back.

Makoto scratched the back of his head and reached for the door handle of his room.

"Brother!" Two voices in unison called out from behind him.

"Ran, Ren," he turned around, trying his best to wear a decent smile.

"Haru isn't with you?" Ren asked with a hopeful look on his face.

"No, he isn't not today."

"Aww," the twins whined.

"Can you still come play with us then?" Ran asked.

"Sorry you two, brother isn't feeling too good today," Makoto apologized and pat both of them on the head.

The two pouted but still wished for their brother to get well soon and Makoto finally made his way into his room alone after they both ran off.

With a deep sigh, Makoto sat down on his bed and flopped down. He stared up at the ceiling with his hands behind his head, letting his mind linger over the day.

Most days were alright for him, but there was the occasional day Makoto felt weak to his feelings – especially recently with Rin back to being a part of their lives. Makoto was happy that they were finally all friends again, he really missed the days where they could swim side-by-side and the tournament they won (regardless of getting disqualified) was probably going to be one of his greatest memories in his life. But now that Rin was back, it also meant that he was also getting some of Haru's attention. Since his return from Australia it seemed that Haru's mind had been occupied with thoughts of him often. Now that they were friendly again, Makoto couldn't help but notice the bit of excitement in Haru's eyes whenever Rin was around.

He wasn't sure exactly when it happened, but Makoto knew that his feelings for Haru had turned into something deeper than friendship. Every day was a blessing because he got to see him and swim with him. He loved what was so perfect about Haru and he even loved all of his quirks and flaws. Makoto didn't want to mess with a good thing, so he had quietly decided that it was best to remain just friends with Haru.

But he couldn't help but feel a burning pit of jealousy deep down when Haru seemed to perk up at any mention of Rin. Makoto wasn't sure if he could handle Haru falling in love with someone else and it scared him. But he decided if it was Rin he should be fine with it; they were both his friends and he knew Rin would be good for him. But it still hurt to think about.

Makoto let out a frustrated groan and flipped over on his side. He dug into his pocket and pulled out his phone.

'What are you doing?' He typed out and pressed send. A couple minutes later his phone vibrated.

'We just saw each other not too long ago. I'm cooking mackerel.' Makoto chuckled lightly at the response and began to text again.

'I know, just kind of bored already. And I'm not surprised.'

'Do you want some for lunch tomorrow?'

'I'm good, but thanks.'

'Suit yourself.'

Makoto stared at the screen as his fingers hovered over the keys. There were many times where he just wanted to type 'I like you' but stopped himself.

'Good night.' He finally typed out and sent the message.

* * *

As there was no school, Makoto spent much of his day doing his homework and entertaining Ran and Ren. Haru apparently went to meet up with Rin. Alone. Whenever Rin was around it usually included their entire circle of friends, but Rin specifically asked just Haru if they could meet up.

Makoto couldn't help but feel slightly unsettled throughout the day; although he was sure he was worrying over nothing. There was no indication that Haru and Rin even had feelings for each other that extended past friendship, but then again it was quite difficult for Haru to allow someone else to be so close to him. Rin and Haru had become closer than ever since the tournament and it seemed to be venturing into very intimate territory. Haru did not spend his time alone with many people except Makoto and now he was eagerly anticipating spending time with Rin.

"Brother, are you listening to me?" Ran tugged at Makoto's shirt.

"Sorry, Ran. I spaced out a bit, a lot is on my mind," he apologized, shaking himself of his thoughts.

"The show is over and I'm hungry…" she stuck her bottom lip out and looked up at her brother.

"Me too!" Ren chimed in.

"Ah, I'll heat up some food for you two then," Makoto got up from the couch.

"But I want hotdogs!" said Ren.

"I want ice cream!" said Ran.

"Mom and dad said we have to eat the leftovers, and we can't have ice cream!" Makoto said with a sigh but wore a smile nonetheless.

Makoto reached into his pocket for the umpteenth time that day to check his phone and seeing his inbox as empty as it had been that morning. He messaged Haru earlier that day but hadn't received a response yet. Feeling slightly dejected, he slipped the phone back into his pocket and went back to tending to his siblings.

It wasn't until later that evening when his parents came back from their dinner. They went out as just the two of them once in a while and Makoto always stayed to watch his brother and sister.

"Thanks for watching them, dear," his mother said to when they returned home.

"It's not a problem at all," Makoto smiled. "I think I'm going to head out for a bit though, if you don't mind."

"Where are you heading off too?" She asked as she watched Makoto walk towards the door.

"I just feel like walking around a bit," He stood at the door, his hand grasping onto the handle.

"Alright, don't stay out too late."

Makoto nodded and walked through the door. He wasn't sure where he was headed but he just needed a walk to cool his head after being stuck inside all day and watching his brother and sister in the evening. He checked his phone again and was surprised to see a new message in his inbox. He quickly checked it to see that it was not from Haru but Nagisa.

'I just saw Rin with Haru. You aren't with them? Are they alone?'

'Yes, they spent the day together.' Makoto resisted the urge to ask where Nagisa had seen them.

'Oh…' Was the only reply he had gotten. Makoto began to feel nervous from that simple response.

'Why are you asking?'

'Nothing in particular! They sure have gotten really close ever since the tournament.'

Makoto felt a hard lump in his throat and pocketed his phone. He wasn't sure what Nagisa meant by that and he wasn't really sure he wanted to know.

Before he knew it, he found himself standing outside the fence of Iwatobi's swimming pool. Grasping the chain link fence, he let out a sigh as he stared out onto the calm water reflecting the light of the moon and stars.

"Ah…" Makoto suddenly remembered that, as captain, he had the key to the gate and could go in any time he'd like. Although that was probably still not so legal to trespass on school property at night, this one time couldn't hurt.

With a clink, he swung the gate open, looking around to check that no one was around. He slowly made his way to the edge of the pool and kicked off his shoes and socks. Sitting down, he rolled up his pants and hung his legs in the water.

Makoto mindlessly flipped open and closed his phone over and over before deciding to toss it aside. No matter what he couldn't stop thinking about Haru. There had been many times where he considered that the risk of telling Haru about his feelings was worth it, but in the end couldn't go through with it. He knew that Haru probably wouldn't hate him for it, but it would definitely change their relationship forever, and that awkwardness could end up destroying their friendship.

But maybe it was better to just let it out anyway. A denial might be better than just keeping it in after all.

"Makoto?"

Upon hearing his name, his body snapped in the direction the familiar voice was coming from.

"Haru!?" his voice cracked as none other than the guy occupying his thoughts was standing on the other side of the fence behind him.

He went to stand up but Haru had already begun making his way to the gate and walking over to the edge of the pool next to him.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, sitting down beside Makoto.

"Just kinda wanted to get out of the house and found myself walking by the school… What about you?" Makoto watched Haru dip his hand in the water with a slightly contented look on his face.

"I was walking back from Rin's," he replied simply.

"Oh… have fun today then?" Makoto attempted to hide the jealousy in his voice.

"We swam a lot," Haru said in a slightly elated voice. "He wanted to practice with me at the Samezuka pool and we went out to eat afterwards. The restaurant we went to had very good mackerel."

"That sounds great, I'm glad you had fun," Makoto tried to shake the feeling that that seemed like an ideal date to take someone like Haru on.

"Mm," Haru made a sound of agreement and stood up. Moments later, Makoto heard the sound of clothes rustling.

"Ah..!" Before Makoto knew it, Haru was down to his jammers and jumping into the pool, splashing him in the process. "Haru, I don't think we're supposed to be here so we'll probably get in trouble if we get caught!" He said in a worried voice.

"We'll be fine," Haru replied simply and closed his eyes as he floated face-up on the surface.

Makoto sighed and watched as Haru seemed completely at peace with the situation. Haru really did like water… Makoto wondered if there could ever be a person in his life that could be on the same level as his passion.

"Haru?" Makoto spoke up after a few moments of silence.

Haru hummed a response to let him know he was listening.

"How do you feel about Rin?" Makoto asked nervously.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean… Do you like him?" Makoto's eyes wavered on Haru's face.

"Rin is… my friend. So yes," Haru seemed a bit confused as to what Makoto was trying to get at.

"How about more than a friend?" At that, Haru opened his eyes and righted himself up in the water.

"More than a friend?" Haru repeated back and looked up at Makoto.

"Ah, nevermind!" Makoto waved his hand nervously from side to side. "That was a strange question…"

"I'm happy to have Rin back here in Japan with us. I'm happy that I can swim with him again. I'm happy that we can all swim together again. I'm happy that Rin is my friend and nothing more," Haru said with finality his gaze steadied on Makoto.

"Of course… Same here…" Makoto responded weakly, unable to make eye contact with Haru and feeling his cheeks burn with embarrassment. He felt sudden relief over the answer, but at that moment Haru's stare was causing more anxiety than anything.

"Rin wanted to meet with me to talk about Olympic training. He's very serious about it and wanted to know if that was something I would also like to do. I told him that I love swimming but something like the Olympics just isn't for me, but I agreed to train with him if he ever wanted me to." Haru paused. "Why did you ask me a strange question like that?" He said in a seemingly emotionless tone.

"Ah, err…" Makoto stumbled over his words. "Just curious, it was a silly question anyway…" He laughed nervously.

Haru could read Makoto about as well, if not better, as Makoto could read his emotions. He knew that Makoto was really hiding something and made his way slowly back over to Makoto by the edge of the pool.

"What would you have done if I said I like Rin?" He probed Makoto with further questioning.

"I…I would wish you the best…?" Makoto responded in an unsure voice.

"Liar," Haru mumbled and Makoto finally looked back at him. Haru hung his arms on the edge of the pool and rested his chin on top of them. "How long are you going to act like that…"

"Huh?!" Makoto's voice nearly went up an octave. Haru couldn't know… could he?

"Only a fool wouldn't have noticed by now," he responded as if reading Makoto's mind. "I thought what I said at the hotel and at the festival would've been enough for you to finally say something, but you keep acting the same as always," Haru looked out towards the fence and Makoto noticed his ears reddening.

"Haru…" Makoto breathed, his eyes were wide and he could feel his mouth hanging slightly open. So he really knew this whole time.

Haru gave a huff in annoyance.

Makoto let out a relieved chuckle and smiled. "Sorry, I was worried about you finding out how I felt, but you had me figured out this whole time. I shouldn't have expected less from you."

Haru shot a glare towards Makoto before kicking off the edge of the pool and swimming away. As he reached the other edge, he made a sharp turn back towards where Makoto was sitting.

Although Makoto was watching the whole time, he didn't suspect what was going to happen next.

"Wah!" With a sharp tug on both of his ankles, he was pulled into the water and completely submerged.

Makoto resurfaced, gasping for air and moving his hair from his eyes.

"Haru! Why did you do that?" He asked with a slight whine in his voice. Makoto remembered that this wasn't necessarily the first time he had been pulled into a pool fully clothed.

"I'm not going to explain it…" Haru floated next to Makoto and had somewhat of a pout on his face that Makoto couldn't help but find cute.

"I'm sorry…" Makoto apologized again and reached out to push a few wet strands of hair from Haru's face. "I guess I was too preoccupied with messing up what we had."

Haru lifted his eyes and gave Makoto a scolding look.

"I just really treasure what we have but… if you don't mind us being something more…" Makoto nervously gave Haru a hopefully look.

Haruo side-glanced and sunk a bit back into the water, "That's what I've been trying to get you to realize for a while…"

Makoto couldn't help but grin widely and he knew he must've looked silly. He felt a little stupid for never thinking that he may have been a bit obvious with his feelings and that Haru may have responded to them long ago, but all that mattered right now was this moment.

Makoto once again brought his hand to Haru's face and gently cupped the side of his cheek. Haru's eyes were half-lidded and their bodies floated closer together.

"You really are beautiful when you're in the water," Makoto said in a soft voice.

"Be quiet…" Haru mumbled a response in embarrassment.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Makoto moved back a bit. "You're always beautiful; it's just that the water really suits you!"

"That's not what I meant!" Haru's face reddened as he yanked Makoto's collar and closed the gap between them, bringing their lips together.

Makoto nearly jumped back in shock until he realized his lips were pressed against Haru's. His body relaxed but his heartbeat seemed to speed up as Haru showed no sign of stopping and Makoto's hand slowly found its way to Haru's waist. Makoto had felt Haru's skin on plenty of occasions, but at this moment the feeling of his skin under the water felt extremely intimate and stirred a heat in his body.

Their lips separated briefly but not for long as Makoto went in for a deeper kiss. Haru's lips were soft and moist from being in the water and Makoto couldn't help but want to feel more. He lightly ran his tongue against Haru's lips which opened easily to allow Makoto in.

It felt bizarre yet satisfying to literally be floating as they shared a deep kiss, their tongues rubbing against each other almost awkwardly and the warmth of each other's mouths felt intoxicating.

Finally separating to catch their breaths, Haru looked up with slightly glazed eyes and buried his head in Makoto's chest.

"We should get going before we get caught. And my mom is going to be really mad when I come home with dripping wet clothes," Makoto chuckled and gently pat Haru's head.

"You can just come over to my place," Haru mumbled.

"I-Is that okay?" Makoto asked nervously. They had just made their relationship as boyfriends official; he wasn't sure if going to his house right now was considered rushing it…

"I'll dry your clothes. You don't have to stay if you don't want to," Haru seemed to be insinuating that Makoto do stay despite his words.

Makoto rubbed Haru's back, "I'm sure if I called my mom she would be fine if I stayed."

The two made their way out of the pool and successfully locked up the gate without getting caught.

"Ah, I just realized I don't have a change of clothes and I'm not sure if I can fit into any of yours…" Makoto said as they walked down the sidewalk, holding his shoes in his hands.

"That's alright, you don't have to wear anything while your clothes are drying," Haru said with a straight face.

"Huh!?" Makoto nearly shouted as he felt his face heat up.

Haru looked over and Makoto could've sworn he saw a slight smirk on his face, "I'm kidding. You left a change of clothes at my place the other day, remember?"

Makoto placed a hand to his chest and let out a sigh, "Haru, don't do that to me…"

Haru turned his head away and made what sounded like a stifled sneeze.

"Huh? Haru are you laughing!?" Makoto craned his neck to try and see Haru's face.

"No, what are you talking about?" Haru straightened up and continued walking.

"Aww, no fair…" Makoto pouted. But he figured there would be plenty of other opportunities to see Haru showing a smile again one day.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you very much for reading!


End file.
